Last night’s episode begins with three new girls, or “intruders,” entering the mansion. While this triggers all the girls, it especially triggers Cat. Cat deems the girls unworthy and insists it is impossible to remember Deanna’s name. Really she is just trying to pull a classic Ron Swanson:
For the group date, the girls play some version of wrestler netball. It looked like a great time until one of the intruders broke her ankle. Now, I’m not saying breaking her ankle was a good thing, but it pretty much guaranteed her a rose, so it is not the worst thing. There is no way Nick is going to send home a girl that just broke her ankle. That’s just rude.
Next up, Tenille goes on a solo date and wow, there is a lot of honey involved. Honey comb, honey wine, and Honey Badger. She eats, she drinks, she kisses. While it was all sweet at first, her kiss quickly turns bitter and it will henceforth be known as the kiss that sent the mansion burning to the ground.
Tenille goes back to the mansion and all hell breaks loose. Apparently Tenille said her kiss with Nick was gross, and since none of us actually hear this, we become reliant on a she said, she said with Romy. Of course, Romy is involved. Romy yells Tenille did say the kiss was gross, Tenille makes a calm and logical response, and then Romy yells Tenille is being “so aggressive.”
I am not going to tell you who to side with, as long as the person you are siding with is not Romy. Romy attempts to play the victim (again), and while no one is buying it, it is enough to send Tenille running off into the bush.
Suddenly, The Bachelor turns into a remake of The Blair Witch Project- heavy breathing into the mic, shaky cameras running through the woods, and shouting “It’s dangerous” over and over again. The only difference is the people in The Blair Witch Project were actually in danger and Tenille was probably just lost in that weird middle ground between the mansion pool and the tennis court.
After all this, we cut straight to the rose ceremony, where Tenille is looking perfectly composed and put together. Did I just dream her public breakdown?
All of the intruders make it through and two of the originals leave- Rhiannon “Do you want to kiss?” Doherty and a girl named Ashlea, who I honestly thought was one of the intruders. I have never seen her before in my life.
Tonight: Nick kicks someone out of the mansion after Tenille talks to him about last night’s events. Not to be dramatic, but if Romy is not the one leaving then there is no justice left in this world.
