The race that stops the nation is upon us and while we cannot be happier to get out of work a couple of hours earlier and tune in to watch the big race, we all know that the horses aren’t the only thing that will get heads turning. Here are a few stereotypes you are sure to witness this Melbourne Cup Day.
1. The VS Model
This girl thinks it’s NY Fashion Week and has prepped her hair, outfit and nails one month in advance only to realise that everyone is rather too hammered or too invested in the race to actually care about her get up. She will be seen in the corner with her best friend, hopelessly posing for candid photos, in heels which are way too high for her to walk in and trying her best to down a glass of red; not because it tastes good but because it completes the photo. You’ll definitely spot this girl because she will most likely change her profile pic at the end of the day after enormous efforts and countless filters.
2. The Mum
The Mum is also known as the responsible one of the group. She or he likes to remind everyone to “gamble responsibly”, remain hydrated and to not drink and drive. Having a Mum is necessary on days like this because otherwise you would most likely forget your ID, lose all your money on Uber rides and wake up with a shoe missing. The Mum usually has the best time because she spends most of her time looking after other people instead of actually betting money and therefore be the one shouting drinks at the end of the week, unlike the rest of us who will still be justifying how the last one was a “sure bet”.
3. The Rookie
This guy usually has no idea what’s going on but is happy to kick back with a bottle of Corona and snapchat those around him who do know what’s going on. Majority of the people you will see on Melbourne Cup day whether it’s at a pub, at work or on your Insta, fall under this category. While there will be millions of dollars betting on this race, majority of people are just happy that they have been given a few hours off work and have something to add to their Snap story for the day.
4. The Wise One
This guy is only here because his friends are and he likes to make it a point that he is only here because his friends are. This guy has gone to University and therefore likes to use his education as a justification for being that guy who thinks Melbourne Cup Day is the best day to persuade people that statistically gambling isn’t a smart financial decision. This guy usually forgets to take his own advice and is the first to place the wrong bets, making for a solid roasting session from the boys after.
5. The Freshie
The freshie has recently celebrated their 18th Birthday and has decided they would like to be a part of an older and classier crowd. They are usually unaware of their drinking limits, often downing drinks faster than the horses can run. It is hard to spot a freshie as they are usually passed out before it actually hits race time.
6. The Expert Punter
This fella knows the ins and outs on EVERYTHING races related, he could have a diploma in horse race betting. He’s usually heard making remarks like, “Race six is sure to be a winner, mate!” or “Big Orange will win this one hands down.” It’s good to rub shoulders with the expert to get some handy tips and be a step closer to winning some moolah!!!
7. The Drunk Mess
Let’s be honest, the drunk mess couldn’t care less about the horse racing. They’re there simply there for the booze, the liquor, the bevvies (get the idea) and their only aim is to leave the races blind drunk. The less they remember from their day at the races experience, the better! Be careful when encountering this type of person as they can also do some pretty out of the ordinary things like this lady at last year’s Melbourne Cup for example.
