Yep, it’s that time of the year again – a time for family, Christmas cheer, bountiful food and some not-so-great gifts.
Tip* it’s a good idea to work on your ‘pleasantly surprised’ and ‘joyful’ expressions prior to the big day, just in case on of these bad-boys makes its way into your Santa sack.
- Handkerchiefs – The Christmas gift that keeps on giving, blow after blow, in sickness and in health. The Hanky is a timeless delight – for a more personal touch (if you are really lucky) the gift may be embroidered with your very own initials.
- Socks – So practical, so versatile, dress them up, dress them down, wear them with slides (it’s totally IN) make them into a hand puppet, use them to stuff your pants at that superhero party you are invited to. You were only complaining last week that you have no matching pairs! Look these ones even have the days of the week on them – how convenient.
- Liquor filled chocolates – how do you simultaneously ruin both chocolate and alcohol? Place a sickly, alcoholic substance within a teeny tiny bottle-shaped chocolate, wrap in foil, place within a box and sit under the x-mas tree (in the summer heat) for the foreseeable future. Mmmmm delicious.
- The most recent Mathew Reilly / Jodi Picoult / Tom Clancy or Patricia Cornwell novel – no, no, this one isn’t similar to the other ones at all! REALLY different story line, I promise.
- Bath Bombs/Salts – Either a subtle hint that your personal hygiene is lacking or that your relationship with said gift-giver is on the brink of collapse. Both insulting (excuse the pun) and impractical – when you bathe on average once every 2 years the last thing you want is a fizzy lavender scented ball bubbling around where it shouldn’t.
- Set of Chutney / Jam / Hot Sauce / Relish – Condiments, while undoubtedly tasty, are equally aesthetically pleasing and are therefore likely to sit untouched on your bench, slowly becoming part of the décor, until you remember them 3 years later when you have that BBQ for Uncle Bob’s Birthday. At such a time you will realise they are long out-of-date and discard of them without another thought.
Don’t forget to work on your ‘Xmas game face’ you don’t want to be caught out like these suckers on Christmas morning.
Seasons Greetings.
